It is not easy penning this... but I do feel that it is the very least that I owe to Ah Wang.
Try as I might and sissy as it may sound, I am shedding tears at the passing of a companion, friend and at times, even a guardian.
I first met the gal about 9 years ago and got bite marks to show for the brief meeting that was also to be my first dinner at my then-girlfriend's place.
Ah Wang was 11 years old then, abandoned by its owner and taken in by my girlfriend's mother, she was a complete "house-dog" that had never received any training, medical attention nor time outside of the HDB apartment she knows as home.
Sure she did not have any table etiquette, protesting loudly if she did not get to share in anyone's meals. Her scant regard for manners meant poo mines and pee hazards around the house.
The years that we stayed together sowed mutual understanding.
Ah Wang learned enough discipline to confine her bowel antics to the bathroom and wait patiently to be fed (strangely, these only apply when I am around). She taught me care and devotion that transcend language and physical boundaries.
I was initially prohibited from taking the gal out. Unpredictability and tedium (she did not know to climb or descend the stairs so had to be carried, all 25kg of her) were cited as main reasons but I won out over time.
I did not have a driving license nor vehicle so outings were confined to walks around the neighbourhood. Nevertheless, the sight of her leash never failed to excite her into a frenzy. She loved her walks so much that she even made the Herculean effort to master the stairs (there were no lifts then).
When I got my driver's license, the old gal was deemed too frail for long or adventurous trips, so we made do with games of Hide-and-Seek, Catching and Monster Claw around the flat.
Sadly, her only rides consisted of outings to the vet or groomer, both strange new realms.
Despite daily "complaints" from my mother-in-law, deep down, we all know that Ah Wang is every bit part of the family and indelible part of our lives.
Remarkable as Ah Wang's health was, her body was starting to unravel with age. Just last year, we had to admit her for treatment for vomiting and the runs. Her weight plummeted from over 20kg to barely 12kg. The sturdy old gal showed us that she had it in her yet... and pulled through.
However, the weight loss continued surely but slowly. Then last week, she started to lose strength in her limbs and could hardly stand up. Still she battled on... eating slowly, she was soiling and wetting herself but insisted on huffing and puffing to stand (albeit with assistance) and follow us around.
Encouraged, I drew up designs for a D.I.Y. walker to help her exercise and move around.
Alas, it was not to be.
I received a call this morning from my mother-in-law. Ah Wang had been crying the past two nights and started throwing up blood last night.
She has decided, after very heart-wrenching deliberations, for euthanasia.
After making the arrangements with the undertaker, my wife and I visited Ah Wang for the last time earlier today. Her debilitated and feeble body sprawled on a makeshift bedding of towels, I do not know if she understood the choked words of comfort and good-byes that were muttered to her. When I whispered my final farewell, she struggled as if to get up but only managed to cough up more dark, foul (presumably toxin-laden) blood.
We cleaned her up as best as we could and dressed her in her now-oversized favourite Hawaiian outfit. I noticed as I gave her my last kiss that tears, too, are welling up in those doggy eyes.
Name: Ah Wang a.k.a SS Dog
Born: est. 1989
Passed: 15th May 2009
As if on cue, it has started drizzling outside.
Gal, you know that we are hoping that you'd finally be free.
If you get there before I do, don't give up on me. I'd meet you when my chores are through (but) I don't know how long I'd be... ...
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